"Avatar" Leaves Me Feeling Blue, Or Why I Should Stop Buying Movies

I finally saw the big blockbuster film "Avatar" this weekend. OK, I know I'm a little behind the times here. I didn't see it in the theatre or read the reviews, although I hear that it is the top selling movie ticket of all time (even ahead of Star Wars and Jaws). It looked pretty and I figured it will probably win some Academy Awards, so I bought it. I always like to have seen at least one of the films that is nominated!!!

We don't always get around to seeing movies in the theatre unless they are movies that we can take the kids to see. Seeing a PG-13 or above movie on a Friday night involves paying $10 an hour for a babysitter or sending the kids to a Friday Night Live program and some careful planning (to make sure that you can actually see the movie and get back for the 10 pm pickup time). Not to mention the cost of the tickets, about $10 each, and the refreshments. It's not quite as bad as in the Jack in the Box commercial where the refreshments are $22, but it's almost that bad. And then you have to listen to all the noise from the other patrons, and watch them not put their cell phones away, etc. And unfortunately, when I sit down in the evening in a dark theatre, there is at least a 50% chance that I am going to fall asleep anyway, so I'm not sure it's worth the investment. I think I'd rather go out to eat or do something else.

In fact, I did fall asleep during our last movie date, which was Sherlock Holmes. Robert kept having to nudge me because I was snoring. I bought this movie later because I was sure I had missed a really great movie that I would want to see again and again. Big mistake--should have rented it. Although I think in some ways Sherlock was better than Avatar--at least it was different, although I could have lived without all the high tech flashing back through particular scenes.

I did talk my husband into going to New Moon with me on a Friday morning (he was off that day). Movie going is often just not a priority, espcially now that the DVD lag time is only a few months. He also was just about the only guy in the theatre for New Moon --most of it was filled with 30 to 50 year old moms who had come to drool over Taylor Launter and Rob Pattison. Kind of sad, really. At least I had a date! Now I liked this movie, because it followed the book fairly closely. Sometimes the dialog is insipid, but it certainly sounds real--just like the sort of things teens would say to each other. And I didn't fall asleep (a bonus of seeing a movie in the morning).

Although I must say, Avatar did keep me awake. I expect it was all the shooting in the second half. But that doesn't mean that I thought it was a really good movie. In fact, my husband and I were doing the "sledgehammer pantomime" behind the kids the whole time. As in, do we really need to bring out the sledgehammer again on this movie? (We felt the same way about the movie Crash, by the way. OK, folks, we get the message--can you please put the sledgehammer away and have some intelligent dialog or something?)

Yes, I let my kids watch Avatar, although I won't take usually them to PG-13 stuff in the theatre (except Harry Potter). The language was bad, but bad language doesn't bother me much in movies as long as it's not so thick that it totally distracts from the dialog (as it did in Crash, by the way). I guess it's because I've read Chaucer--very little fazes me. I just told the kids that I thought the bad language was inappropriate for them to use and that I'd better not hear them using it, but I guess they had to do something to turn this into a PG-13 movie. The violence was not particularly bloody and there was virtually no sex, so you have to do something to get the teenagers to attend. I may have to make another exception for Robin Hood soon, and let them see it in the theatre, although I have managed to get out of taking Amelia to see Clash of the Titans (she likes a lot of fighting in her movies).

The kids loved Avatar. In fact, I watched it TWICE with them this weekend. And the plot was about on their level. The film was definitely pretty, and the special effects were awesome. So I liked that part of the film. But the plot was basically this: environment (sort of a sci-fi rainforest) GOOD. Native people (blue aboriginees) GOOD. Military guys: BAD. Corporations: BAD. Scientists: GOOD but NAIVE. In fact, it's actually very similar in plot to Dances With Wolves. There was very little humor in this movie, as well.

I knew this was not going to be a great piece of fiction when the goons from the Corporation were trying to talk the narrator into taking his dead twin brother's place in their Avatar program DURING the dead brother's cremation. Like this would ever happen! And what was the point of sending the guy to the planet over a five year period, so he could spend three months learning all about the native culture, if they were going to start bulldozing the place BEFORE he had even made an attempt at relocation negotiations? In fact, if the Corporation and the Miliary really just wanted to strip mine the whole planet and kill everyone, why have Scientists and an Avatar program at ALL???? I don't know if something subtle got mislaid on the cutting room floor or what, but the character motivations just didn't make sense. Even the key item that the Corporation was interested in mining was called Unobtainium. You would think with the huge budget that this film had, they could have come up with a less obvious name. It's like they named the substance for fun and never got around to coming up with something better.

The most interesting thing (other than the florescent jungle, which was reminscient of glow in the dark miniature golf courses), was that the main character was in a wheelchair and was able to do all kinds of amazing things in the Avatar body, so I could certainly understand HIS motivation. And the hot blue chick was a substantial motivator as well. And I liked the scene at the end when she saw what he REALLY looked like without the Avatar body, and wanted to be with him anyway.

So anyway, this movie was definitely a bit of a disappointment for me. I guess my husband and I are not the target demographic any more. We have just seen too many movies. After all, if we are at the movies we usually turn to each other during the previews and say, "That's a MUST MISS!"

Seriously, I think I liked How to Train Your Dragon better, despite the inaccurate Viking Garb and the similarities to the Aragon dragon movie (oh, talk about a BAD movie, and even the costumes stunk!) At least How to Train Your Dragon was funny.
Avatar was just bad allegory. Everything in Avatar was just too black and white, except the florescent rainforest.

I like a little more complexity in my plots, thank you very much. Why not have the "Unobtainium" be a substance (with a better name) that could really help save another planet (like Earth) or another group of people? So it's a choice between helping one world and leaving another alone? Why not deal with issues of responsible harvesting and mining vs. irresponsible behavior? Why not have some good corporate or military goons or some bad natives in the mix? Why not have a native who was selling out the People? Or a group of natives that DID want a different way of life?

Real life is just so much more complex than the movies. For example, my understanding is that we are overfishing our oceans, and now we have a catastrophic oil spill that may really do some serious damage to the Gulf of Mexico and its fishing industry. But there are a lot of complicated issues involved. We want to preserve the oceans and their wildlife and we know that effects our whole ecosystem in ways we don't fully understand. But ordinary people make their living by fishing. Other people like to eat fish and it's good for you, especially compared to some other sources of protein. We are carnivores--most of us are not vegetarians and even some vegetarians like fish. There are lots of restaurants that serve mostly fish and need fish to keep operating (even in the land locked Dallas area). People need oil to run things, like their vehicles. I don't think anyone spilled the oil on purpose or that anyone was drunk this time, so obviously we need to find out why the explosion occurred and make things safer--if that's even possible. I'm sure OSHA and other agencies and groups will be investigating for a long time. But all of these issues need to be balanced. Is there a way to raise oysters and shrimp and some of the other overfished species on land? If not, what limits on fishing should be placed and what will that do to the prices for those types of fish? What should we order in restaurants and what should we stay away from, assuming dolphin isn't on the menu?

And the only thing I could really think of to do about any of it was order some oysters over the weekend while they are still available at a decent price.

Well, Professor Tolkien despised allegory, and I find it's not my favorite genre either. In fact, I'm not even sure this film's plot rises to the level of allegory.
So watch it for the pretty colors, or the great use of digital technology, but don't expect to find the solution to the world's environmental problems in Avatar.

Pleasant Valley Mom (looking forward to Robin Hood--Hope It's Not A Film With a Message)